Orange Mojo & Hipster Warts

I've never met the owner of this bike, and I don't know exactly why they built such a spectacularly orange rig. Given the level care and attention to detail in the build, I like to think of it as a dedicated Ironic Orange Julius Bike>.
So ridding off-road is a no go (this bike is only genuinely ironic when ridden on road). I imagine my good friend Mr. bikesnob would agree. Sure it's a little bit pricey for a bike devoted to a $3 beverage, but you can't put a price on style.I would also like to bring to your attention this photo (below), which I took of my bike today in its "at work" parking space. Now, clearly my bike is afflicted by a fairly advanced case of hipster cysts, but whats more disturbing are the large black objects protruding from the seat stays and seat post. I belive I may have addationaly contracted a case of hipster warts. But I'm not much of a bike doctor and I think I'm going to need a second opinion before I can confirm anything.
It all started when I received a fancy new Knog Bulldog Bag, (combination bike pannier / backpack) as an early holiday gift. Initially I was very excited, as the thing is pretty damn cool. It installed easily, and came with all the tools necessary. It also functions as a back pack, although I haven't taken any photos of it in back pack mode. I managed to posted a picture of it on my bike, just before I left for winter vacation. I have finally had a chance to test the thing out and I'm pleased to say it functions very well. I am however, not completely without complaints. For my test run, I left my house with the bag loaded up with a few things, shoes, water bottle, red bull, boxers and some miscellaneous stuff. The first thing I had to do when I left my house was walk down a flight of stairs, and right off the bat I noticed my bike was allot heavier. Next I road the bike to the buss stop. While waiting for the buss, I removed the bag, so I could bring it on the buss with me. This also makes it easier to lift the bike onto the buss rack. I'm still not very good a removing the bag from the system, but it was fairly easy. When the buss came I grabbed the bag and got on. When I got to my stop on the buss, things got a little bit trickier. Putting the rack back on the bike isn't all that easy.
Especially when your standing on the side walk and have to hold up the bike. Also adding to the difficulty is the front wheel on my fixie had a tendency to turn to the side, due to the lack of brake and shifter cables. This makes the bike even harder to control as you try to put the bag back on. But with perseverance I succeeded. I also imagine this part would get easier with practice. I rode the rest of the way to work with no problems. Ridding with the bag attached I didn't notice any difference other than I felt allot slower from the extra weigth. I consider that a good thing, the bag is well designed enough so that you don't know it there and it provides ample wheel clearance.

My main complaint is of course the Hipster Warts. Which are just ugly, but they only bother me when the rack is off. Since I live in a very hilly area and I don't really need that much cargo room, I have found myself ridding with it off more than on. However, if you live in a relatively, flat urban area, like to ride a low-geared single speed bike, and want a semi-permanent rack that can be removed without tools; then this may be the perfect thing for you. As I come to grips with the fact that none of those thing are true for me, I will probably have to plan some evasive surgery to remove all those "Warts" for the time being.